Pokey Pokey Beaks - Bet

Sigh... howdy ho everybodies

As you can probably guess, it is that time of the year again... sigh.

I was dreading it for months, and I had hoped that winter would just go all year long so I wouldn't have to put up with those beady eyed pokey pokey beak things again, but here they are.

Just look at them!

 Swarms of them!  Literally swarmed by those nasty hummingbird things!  They are attacking me and sucking my precious blood!  I told her hummingbirds were evil!

   

They even have the GALL to land on my nose!  MY. NOSE!

I'm almost afraid to keep my eyes open because they even try to poke me in the eye!  I'm not a flower you silly hummingbirds!

OOOH, I think I squished one!  I hope the Musher won't be mad.

 I can feel it buzzing under my paw even!

 It doesn't seem very happy to be under there... let me lift my paw up a bit and ...

OH crap!  His buddies are dive bombing me!  Fine! FINE!!!!

 I'll just sit here and maybe they'll go away... shoo shooo you stupid hummingbirds!

 IEEEEEE they're in my ears!!!!

 They're going for my eyes!!!  They just won't leave me alone!

 HELP!

 Maybe if I roll around, I can squish some of them!

 What?  These aren't hummingbirds?  They're mosquitos?  Well, they're big enough to be hummingbirds.  I wouldn't be surprised if they carried off one of the stupid cats, they are just that big!

I think they've exsanguinated me.  I'm pretty sure the only thing that will save me is some waffles...

 ... and some shrimp and pasta... and a full body mosquito net.

- Bet

They're Coming - Bet

Howdy ho everybodies, it's your Auntie Bet here!

I bet you're all wondering what I'm wearing. No, this isn't one of my new fashionable ensembles, although I do make it rock. This is for protection... MY protection.

No, it's not for the roving scary thingies, or bands of slathering coyotes, it's for something even more sinister and evil... something that is so scary that I dare not mention its name for fear that it will bring swarms of them upon us....

They are...

Hummingbirdus Pokeyoureyeoutus

I hate them!  I really, really hate them!

They're on their way, and the Musher insists on putting food out for them!  It's like she has this crazy wish to have her eyes poked out with their sharp beaks!

If you think she's crazy, check out this guy that developed a one of those evil beady eyed things feeding helmet!!!

Can you imagine having that thing so close to your eyes!  Its just a matter of time before they poke one out, flitting around like that!

Those THINGS ruin everything for me!  They ruin my time out on MY deck.  They ruin my FUN.  Not to mention that Tic hasn't been the same since they held him for ransom.

Thankfully the strange winter and the wacky weather has delayed their migration somewhat, otherwise we'd be swarmed by those dangerous flitty pests already.

I'm trying to figure out how I can keep them from invading us next year.  My latest plan is to take the shedded fluff from the Pretty Curly Tails and having Tic and Bait knit together a protective bubble that we'll cover the entire North Wapiti compound in.  I haven't figured out how to keep it from sagging onto us when it rains... and I can't imagine that smell. 

I also had a plan B, where I made Tic drink all of the evil beady eyed thing sugar water.  No sugar water, no dive bombing and missing eyes!  I thought that was a brilliant secondary plan, except for one thing... apparently sugar water packs on the pounds and now Tic can't reach the feeders.

It's so hard to find good help around here.

- Bet